My life to-date has been a lesson in futility, and I don't see an end to the pattern. The best possibility is that I'm insane and delusional. So be it. I'm at my wit's end in trying to tell this world 'the truth'.
The truth is I sincerely believe I'm the reincarnation of Jesus of Nazareth, but so what? What value do I bring to the world this time around? A bunch of fear-mongering, apocalyptic rantings? How's that going to save the world?
I feel like a zero not a hero, and I'm hardly even a good Christian as far as that's concerned. Honestly, I've been a tempermental, often depressed, self-destructive alcoholic raging at my Creator for most of my life, and it's seemingly gotten me no where. I've been mostly jobless for the past four years, never found time for a wife and family, been ostracized by family and friends, am effectively homeless, been shut out of virtually every forum I've joined, own little of 'value' and will soon go bankrupt. As my buddy Rob says, maybe God did choose me, but He made a bad choice and would be much better off selecting someone else. I'm just no good at this world savior bit, so, please God, find someone else!
The historical reality is that a personality cult developed around the man I was 2000 years ago that has morphed into a myth filled with magical thinking and persuasive lore much the same as the Santa Claus fable. And if anyone is going to fall short of expectations regarding Christ's return to this world, that'd be me.
Consider that there really was a Saint Nicholas:
Imagine what Saint Nick would think if he returned to the world today and found his "followers", in all seriousness, expecting him to live at the North Pole with toy-making elves, and fly in a sleigh drawn by eight tiny reindeer, led by one with a red shiny nose, to deliver presents to all the "good kids" on Christmas Eve?
The major difference between the Santa fable and the myths that comprise much of modern Christian doctrine is at least kids stop 'make believing' the fable they were taught by 10-years-old-or-so because the preponderance of historical evidence proves inconsistent with their unrealistic worldview.
[Do bear in mind that I deem this universe and human HIStory as a form of subjective fiction (of my story?). IMHO, ultimately all that's eternal and "real" is the meaning of God's love around which our story is wrapped. Believe it or not!]
The truth is I'm a man not a myth; a deeply flawed creature, not some fantastic, all-powerful demigod. (After all, Who do you think Jesus was praying to 2000 years ago? As for "immaculate conception" and God being Christ's biological father, this is a fabrication put in place to attract pagans to 'Christianity' in ancient times.) If it's a man-god you want, then there's tyrants out there ready to fulfill your misled slave-wishes:
As an American, I personally prefer people think for themselves and engage in responsible self-governance. What's more, as a realist, I can say I won't be showing up on clouds with great arrogance any time soon for the sake of fable adherents. Such a haughty, ostentatious presentation is not God's humble style. It's man's style.
As it stands, I'm having a hard enough time taking care of myself, never mind saving the world. So what's the use of keeping at this anymore? Especially given that I'm getting no help whatsoever in saving humankind from itself. This fallacy must end, and I need to get on with my own life, what's left of it at least.
Those interested in the Christian myth rather than Christ the man will likely be relieved by my crisis of 'personal faith'....that is, until the Antichrist makes his move to steal God's throne.
I just hope I'm truly deluded, because, if not, I just don't see how there's any hope at all. The Author seems to have written me into Mission Impossible as the lead character.
Happy Easter?!
BTW, "resurrection" does occur for human beings, but Jesus Christ didn't have a monopoly on life after death. Resurrection is reincarnation after one dies and goes to "heaven" IMHO. (Which happens, I believe, for even the likes of Christopher Hitchens.)
I think it's no coincidence that the "Talpiot Tomb" of Jesus and family was recently found:
I believe the ossuary for "Jesus son of Joseph" likely contains the bones of my body from 2000 years ago. (Although the Knights Templars might have discovered the ossuary of Jesus in Jerusalem, took the bones and buried them in France as examined from 19:45 in this BBC documentary.)
What's more relevant for true beliefs is that near-death experiences and past-life "memories" are real phenomenon worthy of intense investigation by science and religion alike.
However, the 'heaven or hell' model presented in the context of "organized Christianity" is mostly fanciful poppycock relative to evident reality used as a control mechanism....and that's why modern church "authorities" insist on blind faith and condemn Christ followers under their control looking up from their Bibles at the actual universe the Creator is authoring each and every day (in which we all are co-authors, by definition, in authoring our own life stories while here). [Also see how "scriptural" references to reincarnation were either banned or misconstrued by the church long ago.]
What's amazing is that reincarnation, in the form of the "Second Coming", is the centerpiece of establishing Christ's resurrection and nullifying belief in "death". Furthermore, this serves to establish God's sovereign AUTHORity in writing human HIStory. (At least we all better hope so.)
Yet, here I am typing away apparently to no avail as usual, but maybe that's somehow still best at this juncture.
Oh well, like with Santa Claus, the 'myth' ultimately serves God's loving purpose. How exactly so given a coming Apocalypse remains to be seen, but why not add one more far-fetched angle to this unbelievable story unfolding around us?
"Men must be governed by God or they will be ruled by tyrants." - William Penn
"Right is right, even if everyone is against it, and wrong is wrong, even if everyone is for it." - William Penn
The truth is I sincerely believe I'm the reincarnation of Jesus of Nazareth, but so what? What value do I bring to the world this time around? A bunch of fear-mongering, apocalyptic rantings? How's that going to save the world?
I feel like a zero not a hero, and I'm hardly even a good Christian as far as that's concerned. Honestly, I've been a tempermental, often depressed, self-destructive alcoholic raging at my Creator for most of my life, and it's seemingly gotten me no where. I've been mostly jobless for the past four years, never found time for a wife and family, been ostracized by family and friends, am effectively homeless, been shut out of virtually every forum I've joined, own little of 'value' and will soon go bankrupt. As my buddy Rob says, maybe God did choose me, but He made a bad choice and would be much better off selecting someone else. I'm just no good at this world savior bit, so, please God, find someone else!
The historical reality is that a personality cult developed around the man I was 2000 years ago that has morphed into a myth filled with magical thinking and persuasive lore much the same as the Santa Claus fable. And if anyone is going to fall short of expectations regarding Christ's return to this world, that'd be me.
Consider that there really was a Saint Nicholas:
Saint Nicholas (Greek: Ἅγιος Νικόλαος, Hagios ["Saint", literally "Holy", Latin: Sanctus] Nicolaos ["victory of the people"]) (270 – 6 December 343), also called Nikolaos of Myra, was a historic 4th-century saint and Greek Bishop of Myra (Demre, part of modern-day Turkey) in Lycia....He had a reputation for secret gift-giving, such as putting coins in the shoes of those who left them out for him, and thus became the model for Santa Claus, whose modern name comes from the Dutch Sinterklaas, itself from a series of elisions and corruptions of the transliteration of "Saint Nikolaos". [Wiki]
Imagine what Saint Nick would think if he returned to the world today and found his "followers", in all seriousness, expecting him to live at the North Pole with toy-making elves, and fly in a sleigh drawn by eight tiny reindeer, led by one with a red shiny nose, to deliver presents to all the "good kids" on Christmas Eve?
The major difference between the Santa fable and the myths that comprise much of modern Christian doctrine is at least kids stop 'make believing' the fable they were taught by 10-years-old-or-so because the preponderance of historical evidence proves inconsistent with their unrealistic worldview.
[Do bear in mind that I deem this universe and human HIStory as a form of subjective fiction (of my story?). IMHO, ultimately all that's eternal and "real" is the meaning of God's love around which our story is wrapped. Believe it or not!]
The truth is I'm a man not a myth; a deeply flawed creature, not some fantastic, all-powerful demigod. (After all, Who do you think Jesus was praying to 2000 years ago? As for "immaculate conception" and God being Christ's biological father, this is a fabrication put in place to attract pagans to 'Christianity' in ancient times.) If it's a man-god you want, then there's tyrants out there ready to fulfill your misled slave-wishes:
As an American, I personally prefer people think for themselves and engage in responsible self-governance. What's more, as a realist, I can say I won't be showing up on clouds with great arrogance any time soon for the sake of fable adherents. Such a haughty, ostentatious presentation is not God's humble style. It's man's style.
As it stands, I'm having a hard enough time taking care of myself, never mind saving the world. So what's the use of keeping at this anymore? Especially given that I'm getting no help whatsoever in saving humankind from itself. This fallacy must end, and I need to get on with my own life, what's left of it at least.
Those interested in the Christian myth rather than Christ the man will likely be relieved by my crisis of 'personal faith'....that is, until the Antichrist makes his move to steal God's throne.
I just hope I'm truly deluded, because, if not, I just don't see how there's any hope at all. The Author seems to have written me into Mission Impossible as the lead character.
Happy Easter?!
BTW, "resurrection" does occur for human beings, but Jesus Christ didn't have a monopoly on life after death. Resurrection is reincarnation after one dies and goes to "heaven" IMHO. (Which happens, I believe, for even the likes of Christopher Hitchens.)
I think it's no coincidence that the "Talpiot Tomb" of Jesus and family was recently found:
I believe the ossuary for "Jesus son of Joseph" likely contains the bones of my body from 2000 years ago. (Although the Knights Templars might have discovered the ossuary of Jesus in Jerusalem, took the bones and buried them in France as examined from 19:45 in this BBC documentary.)
What's more relevant for true beliefs is that near-death experiences and past-life "memories" are real phenomenon worthy of intense investigation by science and religion alike.
However, the 'heaven or hell' model presented in the context of "organized Christianity" is mostly fanciful poppycock relative to evident reality used as a control mechanism....and that's why modern church "authorities" insist on blind faith and condemn Christ followers under their control looking up from their Bibles at the actual universe the Creator is authoring each and every day (in which we all are co-authors, by definition, in authoring our own life stories while here). [Also see how "scriptural" references to reincarnation were either banned or misconstrued by the church long ago.]
What's amazing is that reincarnation, in the form of the "Second Coming", is the centerpiece of establishing Christ's resurrection and nullifying belief in "death". Furthermore, this serves to establish God's sovereign AUTHORity in writing human HIStory. (At least we all better hope so.)
Yet, here I am typing away apparently to no avail as usual, but maybe that's somehow still best at this juncture.
Oh well, like with Santa Claus, the 'myth' ultimately serves God's loving purpose. How exactly so given a coming Apocalypse remains to be seen, but why not add one more far-fetched angle to this unbelievable story unfolding around us?
"Right is right, even if everyone is against it, and wrong is wrong, even if everyone is for it." - William Penn
Dear J Adams
ReplyDeleteI understand your pain and struggle with all the stuff that is going on in the world in the Name of G-d right now. We are praying non stop for the Truth to set us all free from all the fiction and lies. My own heart is crying with you. In G-d we TRUST.
Blessings.
Christina
What a strange blog I seem to have stumbled upon...
ReplyDeleteI grew up seeing knowing and hearing knew things nobody else knew I started studying why I looked and read books grabbed a psychic circle bored by misstake in 1999 I was attacked and still going through a lot I have jesus and jehovah telling me that their my husband's and I there wife I have two children we all three are being attacked in gods name and jesus name its been going on for 12 years so if there is a god why would he allow such to happen as such there's more going on chairs being pulled out just can't wait to die that way I can see god the great for allowing such sick to happan to anyone esp a child
ReplyDeleteThis is a great job. Why then don't you blog at christian chronicles so that you address the desired audience.
ReplyDeletewww.christianchronicles.webs.com